3 Keys: A Conundrum

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About the 3 keys:

As I looked back to the learned past, I’ve been through, I come to realize how thankful I am to the mixed emotions I’ve felt from my environment these days and nowadays. This somehow molds me in becoming a warrior to the battles I will continue to fight on and strive hard to achieve something impossible people do not want me to be, for I am a sort of a weakling for them. But I believe that it is the low that makes the high so sweet, so I am ready to cross paths with Goliath if that will be the case. And I am so damn ready for it.

Thinking through different lenses, I become eclectic in various types of phenomena life’s throwing at me. Thus, the 3 keys created by yours truly, as conundrums in this crazy beautiful life others might understand if they felt or feel the same way as I do. Life is truly a mystery to celebrate its existence with love, hope, peace and acceptance in our own lines.

I am so proud of my gifts God bestowed upon me. And I am solid through thick and thin.

Here’s “the 3 keys” for you to collect!

*First Key:

I am very much comfortable living in a bubble that I forgot that I am truly living on a swaying wrecking ball. So sad, I cannot fix what has been broken. The damage has been done, even the strongest bandage cannot mend it.

In a crowded room, where vultures start circling in the circumference, no one is here as a man or a woman: just a boy and a girl. You know what’s crazy? Sometimes, I also play grown up in this game called, “Who Will Last in the Play-Pretend Game”.

In this so-called house that the forefathers built, what a good foundation – everything, everyone gone plastic. The norms? Be mechanical. But here in this place, it’s quite different from that. In case you want to find out, go here. The place is cold but the people here, hmmm… HOT!

*Second Key:

And now here I am, in a place where I can be me, I feel like I can be anything, say anything, try anything or do anything. No witches and wizards to please, just me time doing the things that I really like in the first place – losing myself in a story.

I smell freedom and comfort here. But just when the bell rings, it becomes an alarm clock signal for me to wake up and go back to the real world.

You can find me here, ask the keeper, as my name engraved on the list.

*Third Key:

Finally, you are here. I’m getting used to people leaving me behind. Not literally leaving me behind let me tell you that, but as they have finally seen the greener pasture outside these walls.

I’m happy for them, truly am. However, as they told me that if their doors finally close – the end game of their chapters here, another one will open for sure to be here. And ta-da! Here you are, like a lighthouse; I am seeing the light of the day, again. Ha-ha!

Thank you for being a good mentor and now a friend to me. I did not see it coming, but I am forever grateful for this chance in knowing you more as a person. I am carrying your principle with me as before on becoming and now I am quite like you – a guide, an adviser, a teacher. Your heart, your personality and your passion to do good things and to inspire others are paving the way for me to absorb positive light and hope for tomorrow. And with that, I think, I am on the right track. So, thank you!


The Guy in a Dream

A guy. Just a guy.

The guy I have never met in my existence. The guy who are just standing there, yes, just standing there with his eyes mysteriously and nonchalantly talking to you to come near him and join him on the abyss of nowhere where light versus dark phenomenon existed – echoing like cacophony, but a beautiful disaster; a beautiful trauma for me. What does this dream imply? Who is this guy? Why does this guy keep on coming back to me – IN MY DREAMS? Is this a constant reminder of something? Mmmhhh… Hideous? Appealing? Bane? Boon? Is this a loop that I must figure out the connection between me and him? Or is this a sign?

All my life, I have never felt a dream that consciously bothering me, that keeps me awake in the middle of the coldest night. A guy in between average and model–like physique (as what I remember about him), bright blonde yet short curvaceous hair, mystique foreign face, sun kissed skin (probably because of the sunny weather), rosy lips like Boselli, an aquiline nose like Harry and eyes bluer than the Circassian sea like Percy is looking at me (like I am a piece of meat, I guess) as the motion of the sea and the dancing coconut trees acting like a Morse code signaling you to come near him. His smile, not catatonic, but a lavishing expression of singularity (in a good way), alluring you like two magnets perfectly destined to match. The effervescent of the light surrounding the guy in a neon classic garments in a summer beach (to hell the place, I do not know) is somewhat magical in the eyes of many circling around him. How can you escape in that charm when you are enchanted by his appearance? The parallelism of our differences seems like a gateway of a mutual understanding of two atypical worlds – the upside down.

Perplexing thoughts billowing amidst the certainty of the great unknown. But there’s nothing settled in a place called dream, for it is only just a dream. A loop kind of a dream wherein I keep on coming back in time where I met him. But just when I grabbed the opportunity to go near him (wherein I run swiftly towards him), that’s when the guy disappeared like tears in the rain slowly evaporating in the air. Then, I woke up hyperventilating that it seemed like the oxygen that I breathe made me dizzy. And yet, here I am, trying to sleep back again hoping I could go back to the place I met him.

To the guy I met in a dream: if you are real, I would very much like to meet and talk to you for I need answers to the questions hounding in the back of my mind. If you are real, I need to see you. If you are real, I got to find you, so that the war in me will come at peace and I will stop contemplating and going crazy pondering that you are just a subtle reminder of a smoke and mirrors. You are such a dream to me!

But until then (if I could go back), I would definitely like to see you in my dreams, again and again… and again.